Potential Jehovah’s Witnesses Witnesses Wanted: We offer these eleven advantages for those who want to become a member of our organization as soon as possible.
We offer, in a short-term perspective, an attractive payment in a wonderful paradise on earth where you will be given a plot to sow what you want, except marijuana, and also pedigree cattle, and a house with every imaginable amenity, tractors, agricultural implements, and a car to go for a walk with the family.
Meanwhile, being a JW you’ll be promoted to an important position within the congregation so that everyone will admire and respect you within a period not exceeding two years
Further, you would not have to investigate the Scriptures because that task falls only on the “slave”, so that you will save many grueling hours of research and study on your part.
You will have many friends within our organization and even a theocratic girlfriend or boyfriend, but as long as you do not go “apostate” or lukewarm.
You will be blessed to give lectures or public speeches up to an hour in the kingdom halls and in assemblies, which allow you to show off and demonstrate your expertise and erudition to your brothers in faith. You will feel accomplished and with great self-esteem.
You will be able, over the years, to apply for the position of anointed as long as you gather certain requirements as a proven loyalty to the organization, and have good appearance, such as white skin, blue eyes, and mediate at least 180 centimeters . If you get this promotion you will become a son of God and brother to Christ, and thus you may eat bread and drink wine at the annual commemoration. It also allows you to be surrounded by admirers and sycophants who seek to be like you too.
As anointed you will have constant invitations from junior brothers, both in homes and in elegant restaurants to enjoy, at no cost to you, heavenly rich viands.
As anointed you will not be forced to go out and preach every Sunday like other brothers, because you’ll be busy shepherding the flock, visiting orphans and widows in their distress and preparing reports and organizing the weekly program in the Kingdom Halls.
If you get Old and you keep Faithful to the organization, you’ll have a gold card to buy what you want and free to live your last years at Bethel, run by brothers.
10- You will be buried like an anointed, with dignity and honor surrounded by your brothers in faith, who will say beautiful speeches of you with great fanfare and tears. Even if you are penniless, they can arrange your funeral in a beautiful cemetery.
And as a plus, for your service to the organization, you will be immediately resurrected to take your heavenly glory and meet your king , Michael the Archangel, and reign with him nothing less than a thousand years. You will also be immortal and you will not have to go through the final test of the millennium as your other colleagues (brethren of the “other sheep”) who will remain on earth.
¿Anyone want to be Jehovah’s Witness? Those interested can contact the elders of any congregation or kingdom hall in your area, district, or neighborhood. Guests are welcomed with open arms and with great theocratic love.
Refrain all who seek only their own selfish interests …